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Posted by on Oct 28, 2017 in Marriage | 0 comments

The Power of the Prenup

The person you marry is not the person you divorce—my uncle learned that the hard way. He was a strapping young lad, and she, a fine young woman. Together, they were supposed to live happily ever after and had three children, a big house, and a strong financial future. My family would always visit them and have the time of our lives. We would go fishing, paintballing, ride four wheelers, and swim as much as we could before eating a delicious meal and falling asleep at the end of a long day. Then all of a sudden, it started to change. Smiles were not so natural, stresses began to grow, and eventually, the knot got loose and became untied. My cousins took it hard, and my uncle eventually got remarried.

People change, and that’s life. I don’t hold it against either one of them, but the courts seemed to side a little more in her favor. She got full custody of the boys, legally moved as far away as she could across the county, received the maximum amount of child support, in addition to alimony, and took half of my uncle’s retirement. Our family was shocked and disappointed, but we still keep her in the loop and treat her as the mother of my cousins.

What upset my uncle the most was only being allowed to see his kids every other weekend. During the week, he drives nearly two hours through traffic on Tuesdays and Thursdays to support them at sports practice and other extracurriculars, but I know he wishes he could be there more. He loves his kids with all of his heart, but the courts didn’t really care to take that into consideration. Since he didn’t sign a prenuptial agreement, as suggested by these Georgia Family Law Attorneys, they ended up siding with her. He worked for eight years as a military man, and went to work right afterwards in a strong professional career. He saved his money, living frugally, and invested heavily in his retirement so he could provide a financially secure and bright future for his family.

His story isn’t the only one I’ve heard of either. Across the country, nearly 40 percent of first-time marriages end in divorce. After that, second marriages have about a 60 percent chance, and third marriages increase to over a 70 percent chance of ending in divorce. The younger generations seem to be more reluctant to get married right away, and many are more inclined to pursue a common law marriage after living together for a while. A lot of my friends are taking it slow, and even though they’ve been together for years, there isn’t really a rush to seal the deal and get married.

My realtor and his “wife” are taking that approach, and they swear they will never get married because they claim the ceremony will bring bad luck. They’re as happy as can be and have been together nine years. They’re also easy going and fun people to be around, so maybe it’s all coincidence, but I appreciate their happiness and commitment to each other.

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Posted by on Apr 2, 2015 in Marriage | 0 comments

How Financial Problems can affect a Marriage

Ask any married couple — every single one of them has had their fair share of setbacks. It is a natural response; after all, that is what happens when you don’t always see eye to eye about some things. Kathleen Snyder’s Marriage Like New: Therapy for Couples website says that some disagreements can be healthy, as they promote collaboration and compromise with one another, helping each other see from another point of view. Nobody can be right about everything all the time and that extra voice from a different point of view can more than aid with someone’s personal growth.

However, more often enough for most married couples enters a third party that may threaten the foundation of the relationship: finances.

Financial instability or problems can become obstacles that can get in the way and cause havoc between couples. There is a lot of stress that comes with finances and this is more than understandable. Individually, a person collects debts and a credit history that needs paying off at some point and being married means that the pair of these individuals must share the burden of these setbacks – for better and for worse. Some people might even threaten and see divorce as the better option than admitting the defeat that surrounds the word “bankruptcy.”

It is nothing but a common misconception that bankruptcy is the end-all of those who are desperate and with no other option. In fact, more often than not, it is filing for bankruptcy that can save you from total destitution. It is often filing for bankruptcy that allows some couples to pay off their debts in a way that gets them to financial freedom while still enjoying a happy, comfortable lifestyle that suits them and their profession. Not only that but the payment plans with bankruptcies can also clear credit histories, allowing for you and your partner to start anew without having to break anything off and away.

There are solutions to every problem and it does not always been giving something up to start again. Do not hesitate to call for help when you think that you really need it; the faster you ask for it, the sooner you need not fall into hasty, desperation-born decisions that you might regret later on.

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